So much time, so little to do... Strike that, reverse it.

25 days and counting until graduation! Until then, I am afraid, I will resemble a hermit in many ways. The only difference is that I will have to leave my house to go to the library... so perhaps I could be a library hermit... do those exist? Before graduation, I have to write two 8-10 page research papers (one written in spanish), another research paper three pages in length (also in spanish) and all three of these papers are due on the same day.. I am so dreading December 8th! I also have a seven page article project to do, and I have to find time to work on a presentation with my group and write another 8-10 page paper with them... suck. However, come December 16th I am blowing this proverbial popsicle stand! That is what is keeping me motivated. My biggest downfall is that I am a master procrastinator. For example, I'm writing this blog that, most likely no one reads, instead of working on my research. But I just spent 3 hours searching Ellis library...let me rephrase... I just spent 3 hours lost in Ellis library gathering sources for my first paper. So I am taking a much needed R&R session... too bad it can only last 20 minutes before I am forced to return to the hell that is my research paper. Who cares about childbirth and midwifery in the Netherlands? ... Because I sure as hell do not.

I've got nothing to do but blog...

So I started this blog for a class last semester, and tonight I thought to myself... "late-night tv sucks, spanish homework does not sound like fun, and packing for the weekend is WAY to much effort at this hour" (as it is considerably past my bedtime). I know what you are thinking, "Maria, it is only 11:17pm!" That may be true, but at the ripe young age of 23, I have many behaviors comparable to those of an 83 year old woman. I like sleep. I value sleep. If I don't get at least 8 hours, I'm a little cranky. It is difficult for me to get that much sleep, with my excruciatingly "jam-packed" schedule, but I make time.

Lately, I have been trying to calm myself in the evenings, not letting myself get worked up over things I cannot change, and not letting myself stress over things that, in the grand scheme of things, are not that detrimental to my well-being. For example... if I don't get the dishes done, if I don't read that article for judicial process (which is a class that I am actually quite enjoying), the world is not going to end, my life will not be ruined, and hey... I might even be a little happier. I used to be a very stressed woman. Taking 18+ hours of classes, working as a nanny 3 days a week and doing overnight work ("playing mommy" as I like to call it), doing at least 3 hours of homework per night, working my second job at Michael's, and still trying to find a smidgeon of time for friends, family, and somewhat of a social life. Well, not anymore. Things just aren't that important.

I'm finally graduating from this godforsaken university in one month from today... and I am happier than I have been in the entire 4.5 years that I have been here. (I actually really love this school, I just despise the arts and science advisement office and all of the empoyees therein save Debi the secretary (for the complete rant on how they screwed me over, see my blog www.myspace.com/xmarexbear)). Anyway, now I'm finishing up my final 13 hours, I am only a nanny and I have the most wonderful boyfriend anyone could ask for, the most supportive parents, and the best friends in the world. I'm happy. Maybe that has influenced my decision to pick this blog back up (only this is me... not women's literature). No one I know has this address, and I also like that. It's kind of fun to be that mysterious person. And even if no one reads this, I don't care... I'm not doing this for anyone else, I'm doing it for me.